Proposal for a Promise

The relationship was hardly perfect, but it somehow made sense.

We fought about silly things, but tried to work it out every time. We were one of those couples who continuously broke up and got back together. We loved each other, but we were young. While we were learning how to be in a serious relationship, we were still trying to ‘enjoy our youth’ and in the process, we made mistakes.

He wasn’t perfect and neither was I. Once upon a time somewhere along the way, I messed up. I did something I wasn’t (and I’m still not) proud of and I was on the verge of losing my very first love. I gave him a reason to doubt me and what we had, and I had tainted the relationship. I wanted to fix it, so I did the first and only thing I could think of to make him realize how real my love for him was.

One day, with my credit card drained of hundreds of my hard earned dollars and my heart in knots, I showed up to his home. I sat him down and told him how much I loved him and that I deeply regretted my bad decisions, and that I wanted him to know that he was the only one I wanted.

I gave him a promise ring.

Promise Ring

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don’t know what made me think he’d want one or that he’d even wear it. The ironic thing, was that I’m not sure I ever felt that he was going to be the man I married and shared a happily ever after with. But, (like I mentioned before) I was young and I was naive. I was blinded by the overwhelming feelings in my heart and thought a simple piece of expensive metal was going to magically make everything better.

I write this post, because I found that ring today – tucked away in a drawer behind other pieces of random trinkets and socks. I’m not sure why I still have it and I haven’t decided what I’m going to do with it now.

That ring did nothing to help our relationship. He didn’t wear it often and even when he did, we still fought over ridiculous things, argued non-stop, and broke up over and over (and over) again. Obviously we weren’t meant to be, and we’re lucky that it was just a ring symbolizing a small (broken) promise and not a wedding band that was supposed to symbolize a lifetime of vows.

The truth is: you can’t buy love and you can’t make someone truly love you with materialistic things. To win someone over with your love, you’ve got to prove your feelings with physical actions, and genuine emotion; you have to be yourself, be honest, and be passionate. The trick is to let your love grow with time. Falling head over heels at first sight is rare (actually, I’ve never had that happen) and the most solid relationships are built off a lot of days spent sharing simple loving moments.

I can’t help but smile and giggle at the fact I once proposed a promise of ‘let’s be together for a really long time’ to a boy. People really do do crazy things when they’re in love. This ring, and it’s now minimal worth (on so many levels) is proof. 

Let’s Love, Not Bully.

The hardest parts of growing up, often involve bullying.
Emotional, physical, and all sorts of cyber bullying – we’ve all been a victim of one or all these. Maybe, we’ve even found ourselves provoking the abuse.

Growing up, I was the target of several different bullies. In elementary school,  I remember taking the long way to class, just to avoid ridicule of immature individuals. I specifically remember two boys (who I had a crush on) taunted me and blackmailed me into using all my allowance money to buy them the latest Will Smith CD. In grade 7, all the girls’ hormones were raging and we bullied each other into tears at least once a week. And of course, I endured my share of teasing, terror and hurtful harassment, while trying to make it through the gruesome years of high school.  I’d also be lying if I didn’t admit to the occasional badgering of others to boost my own ego – even though I knew it was wrong.

No one, regardless of skin colour/age/family history/social class/etc., deserves to be bullied.

If you’re a bully, you need to stop. Take a minute and find the real root of your frustrations; once you uncover what’s really making you mad – figure out how to fix them, instead of making innocent people suffer.
And if you’re a victim of bullying, please don’t be afraid to speak up. It seems like a scary thought – but once you stand up for yourself or ask for help, things will get better.  You deserve the freedom to be you; you don’t deserve any discrimination or ridicule for being just the way you are. 

Love and kindness are louder, better, and more beneficial to everyone.
Let’s make this world a better place. Let’s minimize the judgement, open our minds to each other’s differences, and STOP BULLYING.

PhotoCredit:
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